raspberry hats

a love letter to summer

i put raspberries on the tips of my fingers like they’re hats and eat them one at a time. there’s pink underneath my fingernails from where the juice dripped down and when i wash it off i smile, knowing an uninterrupted moment of childlike giddiness still exists within me. every day i put a bathing suit on under my clothes instead of a bra and underwear because at any moment i could find myself running through the backyard and jumping into the pool. hours fly by swinging on the hammock or laying out on my towel turning page after page in my book, or more often, finding myself distracted by the movement of clouds or the quiet but ever-present sound of bugs and wind blowing through trees. summer brings out the youthful energy and excitement that often feels dormant in me, it pulls me to dairy queen after dinner to get a small cup of cookie dough ice cream with rainbow sprinkles that i’ll eat until my stomach hurts.

summer is driving with the windows down, warm air floating into the car as the opening notes of fleetwood mac’s “everywhere” play out, my hair escaping from the clip or braids fruitlessly holding it back from the breeze. it’s passing farmstand after farmstand, advertising jersey corn and tomatoes and strawberries, laughing at the tourists stockpiling corn, since i know our best corn comes at the end of july. it’s taking walks on the beach, putting seashells in a neon plastic bucket that i’ll empty and examine, saving the most perfect one, and returning the rest to the sea.

i went years without appreciating the simple beauty of a new jersey summer. for a lot of high school, i’d find myself in the cool air-conditioned safety of my bedroom, where i could watch a movie or read a book without swarms of bugs or thick, inescapable heat. i suffered from a lot of heat-induced migraines, often worse if i spent too long in the sun. i longed for autumn, for the pumpkins and corn mazes and apple picking, because for so long, that was when i felt the most appreciation and love for new jersey.

even still, i loved when summer came around and i could lazily float in the pool, my toes hanging off my raft and skimming the cool water. i loved when i would go down the shore with my family for that perfect week we would spend on LBI back when we were younger. that’s the scene of some of my favorite and most treasured childhood memories. i loved when my dad would grill something for dinner and we would eat it outside and watch as the sun would set and the lightning bugs would come out, blinking at us as if saying hi.

my last three summers were spent in d.c., where every day felt hotter and more humid than the last, my linen dresses and tops covered in sweat and stuck to my burning skin, my water bottle a lifesaver amid the heat. i loved summer picnics and fourth of july fireworks in front of the washington monument and nighttime walks back from the metro station. they were special in their own way, with fond memories attached, but those moments differed from the simple joy i unknowingly associated with summer.

i missed opening my window in the morning and smelling grass, driving past the sunflower maze down the street from my house, and sitting by the pool while my dog stared out from the kitchen window and watched my every move as i tried to find a comfy place to spread my towel in the yard. my days were supposed to be filled with $2 bagels, day trips down the shore, and a peaceful, overpowering sense of quiet.

i never believed that time away from a place you’ve spent almost your entire life makes you appreciate it all the more, but spending my first full summer home in new jersey in years has brought me such an overpowering love for this time of year in the place i know best. it feels special in a new way, like i’ve cracked open an oyster that’s been in front of me all this time and found a perfectly shiny pearl. every day i wake up excited to spend time outside, absorbing sunlight to fill my veins with warm happiness.

i’ve never loved summer more and appreciated the ease and serenity each day brings. the last six months have been some of the most tumultuous and stressful for me, so this summer feels like a reset, a much-needed recalibration of my overactive mind. as i sit by the pool and watch the wind send ripples across the surface, the tension and anxiety i’ve gripped so tightly for the last few months slowly begins to ease.

every day is something new, a small sensation or feeling that i overlooked for years and only now have found myself appreciating.

i smell bonfires at night and strawberries in the morning and i feel at home.

snippets of my summer

instead of weekly favorites, here are some things i’ve been reading, listening to, and watching in the past week or so:

reading:

• carmilla by j. sheridan le fanu (

  Madeline Mills
  wrote a great review a while back that inspired me to buy it and read it)

• the virgin suicides by jeffrey eugenides (one of the best books of all time and such a summer read)

• the chandelier by clarice lispector (i just started this and am enjoying it so far)

listening to:

• one of my favorite/the greatest albums of all time rumors by fleetwood mac

• “the girl, so confusing version with lorde” (i’ll be adding “let’s work it out on the remix” to my personal lexicon)

• i was too torn to pick a third, very specific thing so i’m linking my summer playlist

watching:

• once again, the virgin sucides written and directed by sofia coppola (i rewatched it after i read the book, it’s one of the best movies of all time and a visual masterpiece)

• star wars the acolyte (sorry to the online losers and haters, but this show rocks so far. also if you’re reading this, now you know i’m a star wars fan.)

• the bear (i’ve been obsessed with this show since the day season 1 dropped on hulu, and i just rewatched it all in anticipation of season 3. i love this show)

happy summer 🐚🍅☀️🍧

with love,

sarah 🍓

p.s: i want to connect more with you! i recently updated some of the aesthetics of people’s princess, (very minor changes, likely only noticeable to me) including some of my social links in the “about” page. this is my instagram if you want to see more behind the scenes.

okay love you all to pieces!!! see you soon!